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- Gut Golly Saves the World
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- Bawd Mullion is never bored
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- Sav Mylon really
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- Watt Leeks chords
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- Yit Yat on mind control
Gut Golly, besides being a committed bassist, spends a lot of time thinking about how to save people from themselves. According to Gut, his best plan so far is to build thousands of very large passenger ships that don’t go anywhere, but do stay at sea. The point behind them staying at sea is so they can bob up and down on the ocean, they would have large pontoons that act as generators for power. The occupants live on fresh seafood and seaweed, therefore have negative environmental impact. They are entertained the same way millions are on cruise ships and are very happy. Gut has a highly developed plan that covers every possible circumstance.
Gut believes that there are far too many people on the planet and this is the very core of most human and planetary problems. He thinks that using wars to reduce population does not really resolve the issue, because too many environmental problems would result and then, the over excited would start massive rebuilding programs and encourage mass copulating to repopulate, to ensure the success of the rebuilding program. Also, he thinks that most people would not be keen on the idea of mass extinction through military methods, especially when they could be selected as a participant in the cull.
What he believes is needed is the promotion of static behaviour, he says, that is, the end of mass consumption. The ships will not show any movies with cars in them for example, so residents forget about cars and have no desires or love for them. All emotional desires will be encouraged towards each other, so a lot copulating goes on, but not with reproduction results. As residents terminate their need to breath, they can be repurposed as part of the self-sustaining food chain. Over two generations this will greatly reduce the number of big consumers and nobody will have felt any significant impact on their lives. Those lucky enough to get a berth will feel they are living the life of the very rich. Living on a luxury liner.
Gut believes that most human activity, is consuming incoming information, which he believes is mainly perceived as entertainment. So, if the marketing and advertising industry are repurposed as entertainment providers and not sale promoters, this would enable people to become neo-perceivers, then, people will be happy and satisfied with everything, including political leadership.
Gut believes the distinction between the great epochs in human history, that is the religious centuries and now the emerging corporate period are straddle by the current political period, that is nation states.
The religious period used fear of the unknown to help people feel included in the system and mainly slaves as energy. The political period imitates the consumer choice model with having regular changes of leaders and therefore, appearing to provide choice. The political model claims people’s choices are always correct, no matter who they have chosen, because they have avoided the evil of those they did not choose. The corporate period uses mass consumption with the constant urging for more and more consumption and powers it all with fossil fuel.
Gut believes that a speedy adaption to the neo-perceiver syndical system will save humanity. Those who adopt the ultimate bourgeoise lifestyle and live out their lives happily on giant cruise ship, away from the troubles of ordinary existence will be helping to ensure the survival of humanity.
Bawd has a van so he can carry his kit around. He is the only one who can drive and sometimes thinks that he should give up the drums and play a harmonica. He Feels being older is the reason he ended up collecting the payments and splitting it up. He often day dreams about being in a troupe where there is a road manager who looks after all the bits and pieces and he only has to play. The other musicians accept that Bawd should get a bigger cut for his extra expenses and effort and they know very well that if the drummer is not good, the band will be ordinary. Yit, who is athletic, always helps Bawd as much as possible, but he never touches the cymbals. Don’t touch those cymbals, you may have eaten tomatoes and the acid could leach through your fingers. Another interesting thing is, none of the other musicians think Bawd is obsessive, he is careful, they say.
Bawd is careful for a good reason, his life began at the bottom of the bottom of the social ladder. He had one parent, who he cared for from a very early age. His mum struggles with everything and her life only began to improve as Bawd grew older and learnt to manage things for them. That is not to say he achieved all this by himself, there were others who looked out for them as well. Bawd is never bored because he always ends up as the responsible one and that keep him busy.
His first drums were discarded buckets. He was unusual in that, most children will start bashing away, from the outset, Bawd kept time. He was alert to sounds and as soon as he became aware of a consistent rhythm, he would start tapping whatever, along with it. From such humble beginnings, Bawd treasures everything that is his to claim.
Bawd is constantly offered jobs in existing bands; however, he declines because the road musicians live hard lives with constant uncertainty. Session musicians never have big dreams, but they do have a home of sorts with regular meals and people they know and understand.
He hears his playing on the radio all the time. Mainly on jingles, but sometimes on a record and that gives him a warm feeling. His mum will say how do you know that’s you Bawd, listen to the rim shots, the ghost notes, I have no idea what you are talking about Bawd, she will say.
Sav often feels like he is a conduit for something he cannot describe and so, he really has no idea about what is happening. It was probably a result of something he heard at his guitar teacher’s place, where he lived for a long time as a teenager, waiting for his mother to come back and pick him up. His teacher, Bill Dazed, was often in a haze of smoke and said all sorts of funny things that Sav didn’t understand. Improvisation man, let it flow, let go, get in the groove, let it take you to where ever. Sav was sure Bill was talking to himself most of the time.
Sav’s mum, Nearlane assumed he was going to be a successful guitar player and never expected anything else from him. Except of course some domestic duties. Sav simply cruised through life playing guitar and not doing much else. Bill had rambled on about his life as a musician in front of Sav for so long, that Sav knew what to do and how to approach being a professional guitar player. Bill had grown tired of being a guitar player and the lack of definition between night and day. He set himself up as a private teacher close to a leafy suburb and in a leafy smoke haze, Bill became a regular person. He missed having Sav being a live-in student, because the place got very messy and he wasn’t as good as Sav with domestics.
Sav lived a comfortable life as a session player mainly playing on advertising jingles and sounding like whoever the agency wanted him to sound like. The session players would get pickup jobs in bands when someone was sick or left the band on short notice. Sav is part of a group of session players who play together fairly often when jobs come up, but they never considered themselves as a band beyond a particular job. They all get along well because all the decisions are made by someone else and they play whatever is put in front of them. They see themselves as tradesmen musicians and like all good tradesmen they do their job. Yit Yat sings with them and if it is a particularly ordinary job, Yit will substitute words to cheer everyone up. He likes to sing about beer and baked beans which are a staple part of his healthy diet.
Sav was very reluctant to give up his lifestyle to chance everything in the troupe Psychopolies, because of all the things he had heard from Bill Daze. Bill said there are lots of people that have to be paid. The band play, the troupe gets paid. That was funny how Dagge always referred to the troupe, never the band. Sav and Bill are still good friends and so anything Sav doesn’t understand goes straight to Bill for clarification. Bill was very proud of the fact that, even though he never became a guitar hero, he never had to apply for a real job. He only ever played guitar. Now, he spends his time teaching teenage kids to play guitar, he realizes he hasn’t really grown up mentally. Ah well, Sav, maybe I will live beyond the industries age limit and get a matured look at life.
Sav thought Dagge is a very funny fellow. He always looks like he is about to collapse at any moment, then, someone will say something and he lights up and goes off on some amazing rant. Even though it is hard to follow him most of the time, you start to have thoughts about what he has said. It is as though he puts thoughts into your head and then you start making sense of them. Sav now realized he was a failed consumer, because he did not own a big monster truck to drive around town in. He was sure he had heard about monster trucks from Dagge. He could manage his guitar and amp on the train and if he owned a monster truck, he would need a lot more money than he currently gets by on and that would be to pay for parking alone. He knew this from his mum who is a long-haul truck driver.
When Sav was thirteen his Mum dropped him off at Bill’s place for a guitar lesson and didn’t come back to pick him up for over two years. When She eventually turned up to collect Sav, Bill presented her with a very large bill for lessons and expenses. His Mum laughed at it and said, when he is famous you can get it off him. Bill was so shocked he stood there speechless and did not recover his senses till well after they had departed. Sav and Bill have remained very good friends and when Sav visits Bill, through habit, he starts cleaning and straightening the place out.
Bill felt he had an obligation to pass on to Sav the important things he had learnt as a musician. Playing guitar professionally requires many skills beyond where to put your fingers and when to put them there. Sav, if you don’t like people or you are not prepared to make a huge effort to get along with lots and lots of people, leave the guitar in the bedroom. People have very definite ideas about music and if you don’t fit in with their idea of it, or you can’t quickly establish what they identify with, you have no chance. If someone tells you that Klanger Digettes is the greatest guitar player since Flumbots Nottie, agree and excuse yourself quickly. Never show any frustration, everything passes, eventually. When things look like they getting out of control, try to calm it all down, if that doesn’t work, protect your gear and exit, pronto.
You will be waiting around an awful lot. Being good at waiting is important, in my case, I always carry something to read. In fact, there are a few things you should always have in the case, but you will have to work that out for yourself. The better you are at fitting in, the better player you will be.
Watt was raised by his grand farther and they played music together before Watt even knew that is what was happening. Watt’s grand farther Bongo Leeks had spent years teaching the young Watt to play precise rhythm.
There was no mystery in music for Watt, it was very straight forward. The drums, bass and rhythm guitar chords were the heart of the sound and the tighter they are, the better the sound. When Watt meet Bic, they recognized each other as fellow travellers, or people who spent their childhood with old people. Life is no big rush; everything happens in its own good time. This is a good frame of mind to have as a musician, because there is a lot of waiting around for this or that and getting anxious is crazy. Watt started going to the library to see Bic and they sat there happily in silence for hours. When Bic thought Watt might turn up, he would get a couple of books he thought Watt might enjoy and that is how Watt became a book worm. When they went outside though, they would transform into chatter boxes. Talking at a rapid pace about what they had been reading.
Watt made enough to survive as a session musician because he is a chords man and there is always work for keyboard players, especially for ones who do not have to think, they do what is appropriate in time and as required. There is not much demand for rhythm guitar players in session work. The other advantage of being a chords man was, it did not matter what style of music is in fashion, there is always a need for chords. Bic says to Watt, long live harmony. Watt responds, without harmony; life is not too good. Bic knew why Watt is a humble person and he is always impressed that even on stage he never seeks to promote himself.
Yit Yat was not sure about his ancestral make up, because he was only concerned with what lay ahead for him and of course, the fate of the world and mankind. Yit is a first generation migrant and it is all about, where you are going, not being someone from a culture, you do not understand and for that matter, have no experience of.
Yit thought about devoting his life to a God, but couldn’t find one he believed fitted with his view of life, so he settled on becoming a singing athlete. His farther sent him to a church run school and singing songs to Gods was a daily thing and he enjoyed the singing and the more he got into it, the more he realized it was a very physical activity. Yit did not care what the song was about, the words only matter when they sound good. He much preferred to listen to songs in languages he didn’t understand, so he could concentrate on the sound and not be distracted by meaning, that is, if there is any meaning to the words.
As an athlete, he believed, first and foremost, athletes should take care of their body. Getting a job, other than one that is in the field you have chosen, is completely out of the question. He had no intention of doing anything else other than being a singing athlete. He said he was a modern-day monk, but unfortunately the churches do not support singing monks anymore, so he had to adapt to current social conditions and sing for the corporations that were wealthy enough to pay singers to sing about their wonderful products. He had no shame in being a jingle singer, because he is a professional singing athlete and has no opinion or attachment to the products he sings about, whether it is beer or pet food.
Oh, what a beautiful automobile, it is so sleek and fast, I know how handsome I look driving it. I like to eat ruff ruff dog food, it makes my human so proud of me, ruff ruff. When I eat cereal treats, full of wholesome stuff, I am regular, really regular. My true love is beer, beans go so well with beer, oh my dear, the wind from beer and beans can be mean. Yit says lots of jokes occur when recording advertisements and the copywriters are usually the butt of them.
Yit admitted to doing voice overs for advertisements, but he preferred singing jingles. He said the Agency people have very strong opinions on how something is said and it can take the whole booked session to say very little, over and over again.
Yit’s circle of friends are mainly session musicians and sound engineers. They are so preoccupied with learning their trade that they have little interest in much else besides music. Time for them is three-hour recording sessions. Their sense of time beyond that is, their phone playing some silly message that a session is booked in so many hours.
Yit admitted to being extremely ignorant about just about everything except singing. He often wondered how young singers and older singers appear to be equally competent, yet there is a continuous learning thing happening. When he hears very ancient singers belting out a great rendition, he feels he has chosen a good path in life.
When Yit became the singer of the music troupe Psychopolies, he became exposed to people that talked about things he had no idea about, therefore, reinforcing what he already knew about himself, he is ignorant.
On one occasion he was talking with Dagge Dorsell about mental health and said to Dagge, has there always been a mental health problem in society. Dagge lit up, of course not. It is the direct result of the current teaching at the Business School. Of course, there have always been nutters and the unhinged, just browse any history book, they are full of examples crazy people. Mental Health on the other hand, has been developed into a commodity and all commodities can generate wealth. A clever dick at the Business School came up with the idea that the cost of mental health should be included in GDP figures, because you can attribute a cost to it, therefore a value and so the GDP grows and politicians can boast about how they grew the economy. This opens the door for the corporations to provide costly services to government to tackle the problem of Mental Health. Service business spring up all over the place defining mental health and recruiting clinicians and clients, sorry, patients. Then, the legal industry became involved to determine a definition so they can represent clients. The insurance industry says, what about us, the legal industry agrees, what about insurance. A massive service industry grows out of nothing. The nutters and unhinged keep making decisions about control of the world and everyone else, get on with their lives.
Dagge was on a roll. Even though Yit looked like a stunned mullet, Dagge assumed he was interested. Now Yit, this another great triumph of the monks from the Business School. Industry was once considered a way of defining manufacturing goods. Slowly the business monks changed the term from manufacturing to a service sector. Manufacturing was sent off to places where cheap labour and pollution is out of sight and a whole new human society of nice clean polite people exist in a service economy. The monks are now hard at work devising a plan to export their brilliant service economy to the manufacturing economies, because they have proven, profit can be extracted from nothing. The religious scriptures mention profits a lot, they simply spell it differently.
Yit had no control over what had entered his mind. However, it was in there now and from now on, this meme would grow by association with bits and pieces of information that would continue to build inside his psychopolis.
On a bus on his way to a gig one day, Yit saw a group dressed in high-vis outfits. This was not unusual, but what was unusual for Yit was, what his next thought was. When a country doesn’t have any citizens who make anything, they just provide services, because everything is made in other countries, then, what happens when the countries that do make things, think, why are we messing up our country making things, when we could be really rich by providing only services. So, they say, that’s it, from now on we will get a really big GDP and have a wealthy services economy. Then, who makes everything. There must be an answer, but an ignorant jingle singer like me cannot see it.